First Come Twins Page 13

  “Sophie.”

  “I wanted to find out. Isaac didn’t!” Tears fell down her cheeks. “He convinced me that it didn’t matter. He said that whether the children were his or yours, he would love them the same. He did. He was a good man.”

  “And I’m not.”

  “That’s not what I meant.”

  “No. But it’s what everyone on this damned island believes, isn’t it? If you weren’t dating Isaac before you married him, no one on this island would think he fathered the twins. No wonder they all hate me. They all think I walked away from my own kids, walked away from you knowing you were pregnant. That’s what they think, isn’t it?”

  “I don’t know.” She shook her head. “No one ever asked.”

  “My father?”

  “No. Never.”

  “I didn’t even get a chance, Sophie, to set things right. To be there for you. For the kids. You didn’t give me a choice.”

  “Would you have wanted a choice? Before you answer that, think back to who you were all those years ago. Think about how desperate you were to leave Mirabelle.”

  “I would’ve stayed. For you. For the kids.”

  “And given up a scholarship.” Her eyes turned sad and soulful. “That’s why I couldn’t tell you.”

  He turned away. “You had no right to make that decision for me.”

  “I did what I thought was best for everyone. For you. For the kids.”

  “I want…I need…to know.”

  “You mean DNA testing?”

  “Yes. As soon as possible. I need to know whether or not Kurt and Lauren are my kids.”

  “I understand, I really do.” She laid her hand on his shoulder.

  Instinctively, he pulled away. “No, you don’t.”

  “Stop! Think about this! Before you push this, you need to think about Kurt and Lauren and what’s best for them. Please. There’s a lot more at stake than your feelings. A few days, a week, a month won’t change anything.”

  When he said nothing, she dropped her bomb. “You know you’ll be leaving again, Noah. Leaving me is one thing. If the kids are yours, leaving them is an entirely different matter. Think about whether or not you’re truly prepared to be in their lives.”

  “We can know the truth and not change anything. I need to know, Sophie, so I can make a decision.”

  “I think you’ve already made your decision.”

  “How?”

  “When you’d heard that I’d gotten married, that I’d had children, did you honestly not wonder? When you got back and saw them, did the possibility never cross your mind?”

  “No.” On that, at least, he was square. “I found out you and Isaac had kids through Dad. He didn’t tell me about them for a year or more after they were born, but I didn’t know he’d waited. When he told me, I thought they were babies. Now that I think back, he was purposefully vague about the whole deal. Now I know. He was protecting you.” He didn’t know what to say, what to do. “I can’t believe it. My own father.”

  He cleared his head. First things first. “I want the testing done, Sophie.”

  “I won’t consent.” She shook her head. “Not until you spend some time thinking about it.”

  “Well, I guess that settles one thing. You can forget about me leaving Mirabelle any time soon.”

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  BEING AN UNCLE HAD SEEMED strange enough, but a father? Noah sat on his grandma’s couch and put his head in his hands. The reality seemed impossible to accept. All day Sunday, he’d hung around the house, trying to wrap his brain around the idea. He didn’t want to see anyone, talk to anyone. On this island, he felt like an outcast.

  Monday morning, he’d woken up no closer to an understanding let alone an acceptance of the situation. Him? A father? Impossible. Crazy. Incredible. Thrilling. Scary as hell.

  How could Sophie have done this to him? Taken the decision out of his hands? His own brother, his own father, how could they have both lied to him year after year after year? He’d lost out on the chance at being a dad. But as a single guy all these years, Noah wasn’t even sure exactly what he’d missed, and that infuriated him more than anything. The whole situation left him feeling impotent, but there was one thing, at least, he could get off his chest.

  He stalked out the door and headed toward the center of town. The police station was in an old, well-kept white clapboard building a block off Main. Noah passed the American flag flapping in a gentle breeze and pushed into the reception area. A woman Noah didn’t recognize glanced up from her desk, her smile waning after one look at his face.

  Herman Stotz, the assistant chief, was standing at the photocopier whistling softly as the machine worked away. He turned. “Hey, there, Noah.”

  “Is my dad in?”

  Herman faltered, his eyes widened with concern. “He sure is, but I believe he’s on a phone call.”

  “I need to talk to him.” Noah walked past Herman and toward the corner office in back. He found his dad at his desk, facing the window with a phone to his ear. Noah rapped twice on the door and his dad turned.

  “Stan, something came up here,” he said, holding Noah’s gaze. “Can I call you back? Yep. Okay, then.” He hung up.

  Noah closed the door and paced the outer edge of the room.

  “All right, Noah,” his father said. “Out with it.”

  “You didn’t just lie to me once. You’ve been lying to me for fifteen years.” Noah glared at his father. “Who gave you the right to mess with my life like that?”

  No remorse. No guilt. His dad’s expression betrayed no emotion whatsoever as he held Noah’s gaze.

  “All that time I could’ve had with Lauren and Kurt. Lost. And Isaac? Damn him. He lived my life.”

  “Don’t blame your brother.” His dad tossed the pencil in his hands onto his desktop. “It’s not Isaac’s fault.”

  “So this is your doing? Entirely?”

  His dad nodded. “Isaac wanted to call you as soon as he found out Sophie was pregnant. He and I had a pretty big falling out over that. If I remember right, he left you a couple messages.”

  Noah hadn’t been able to bring himself to return his brother’s calls.

  “Eventually he gave in,” Noah’s dad continued. “But it never sat right with him. Never once all those years.”

  “Still you and Sophie kept the decision out of my hands. I wasn’t given a choice.”

  “You made your choice when you hightailed it off this island and never came back. It was damned clear what you wanted out of life.”

  “I might’ve made a different choice with different facts. It was my decision to make. Not Isaac’s. Not Sophie’s. And definitely not yours.”

  A fresh wave of pain swept through Noah. He would’ve been with Sophie during her pregnancy. For the birth. He could’ve been a real father, a husband. That time, those years, were forever lost to him. “What did I ever do to make you hate me so much?”

  Noah looked into his father’s face and saw nothing except anguish in the drawn features, the wrinkles, the knowing eyes. “I don’t hate you, Noah.”

  “Coulda fooled me.”

  His dad looked away.

  Noah waited. “You got nothing to say to me?” No apology. No explanation. “Must run in the family. I have nothing else to say to you, either.”

  BY TUESDAY MORNING, EVERY LAST, straggling wedding guest had checked out of the Mirabelle Island Inn, Marty and Brittany had left for Italy on their honeymoon and Sophie would, after her ritual run around the island, be back in her office, attempting to reestablish her normal summer routine. The tourist season would finally be underway.

  Getting busy again held the promise of helping Sophie deal with Noah’s cold shoulder, but after only a couple of days she already missed talking with him, missed seeing his face. He wouldn’t answer the door, the phone, and she hadn’t seen him up and about. Sophie couldn’t really blame him. Finding out that a pair of fourteen-year-old twins might be yours had to be a lot
to digest. But it was done. The truth was out, and she couldn’t help feeling a tremendous sense of relief after having carried that secret for fifteen years.

  She ran past the massive lilac bushes that grew along Island Drive, slowing her pace, and glanced up, as she did every morning, toward Grandma Bennett’s house. The place looked unoccupied. Had Noah left? Panic made her heart race faster.

  When she reached the inn, she didn’t bother stretching. She went right into the kitchen, looking for Jim. He was sitting at the counter eating breakfast, a cup of coffee in his hand.

  “Have you seen Noah?” she asked.

  “Morning, Sophie.” Jim sipped his coffee. “Good run?”

  “When was the last time you saw Noah?”

  “At Marty’s wedding dance,” Josie said.

  “Did he leave the island?”

  “No,” Jim said. “At least, not that I’m aware. Why?”

  “I don’t know. It’s just…” Oh, Noah.

  Jim set his coffee on the counter. “Leave it alone, Sophie.”

  “Leave it—” Glaring at Jim, she set her hands on her hips. “I am so sick of this town judging Noah so harshly. He’s your son. How can you be so wrong about him?”

  Jim only stared back at her.

  “Have you ever read any of his articles or his books?”

  Reluctantly, Jim nodded.

  “Then how can you miss the fact that he’s a good man? Just because he didn’t become a cop or a marine, doesn’t mean he hasn’t done his part fighting for what’s right. He’s been making a difference out there, and all you can do is criticize him for leaving.”

  Jim pushed his plate of food away.

  “So he left Mirabelle,” she argued. “Where’s the crime in that? A lot of people have left the island. Marty. The two Duffy boys. Mrs. Gilbert’s daughter. The list goes on and on. They’re treated with respect when they visit. I don’t pretend to understand why you and Noah fight, but you’d better make your peace with him, Jim, before it’s too late.”

  “What happened, Sophie?” Josie asked, reaching out for her hand.

  “He found out Lauren and Kurt are his children,” Jim said. “So now he’s acting all wounded.”

  Dumbfounded, Sophie stared at him. All these years, Jim had believed they were Noah’s children. “Noah was right.”

  “About what?”

  “You didn’t tell him about Lauren and Kurt on purpose.”

  He looked away, his jaw set in a stubborn, unforgiving line.

  “You know what, Jim?” Sophie said, suddenly so sad that it had come to this. “The crazy thing is that I don’t know if the twins are Noah’s kids.”

  He cocked his head at her. “How can you not—? Never mind.” He shook his head. “I understand.”

  “I don’t think you do.” She touched his hand. “As much as Isaac was a wonderful man, he came into my life when I was feeling incredibly lonely and vulnerable. In some ways, he was the worst thing that ever could’ve happened to me. In others, the best. Either way doesn’t change the fact that he happened to be in the right place at the right time.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “I know everyone was so happy for me that he came along after Noah left. He seemed to perfectly fill a void. He was kind, generous, quick with a smile. But the truth is we were more like good friends than husband and wife.”

  “You seemed happy. So did Isaac. Looked as if you two got along like two peas in a pod.”

  The more she thought about it, the more she realized that she’d convinced herself she and Isaac had been happy. She’d loved him in a way, but, more than anything, she’d accepted her fate. “I respected Isaac. I appreciated him. That’s exactly what he gave back to me. You know as well as I do, Jim, that Isaac wanted to be a father more than he wanted to be a husband.”

  “And you? You never loved Isaac?”

  “I loved Noah, Jim. Probably still do. Probably always will.”

  NOAH SAT WITH HIS BACK AGAINST the lighthouse, staring out over the moonlit water, waiting. She would come. He’d stake his life on it. There was still too much left unsaid between them. He had to admit, though, she was taking longer than he’d expected, so when light footsteps crunched in the rocks behind him, he breathed a sigh of relief. At least some things in his world still made sense.

  Without a word, Sophie sat next to him. For a long while the only sounds were the waves lapping against the rocks and the occasional hooting of an owl some distance away.

  “I don’t get it,” he finally said.

  “What part?”

  “Did you come on to Isaac?” Anger and accusation shaded the tone of his voice, but he couldn’t seem to tamp it down. “Or did Isaac come on to you?”

  “It wasn’t like that,” she whispered. Shame and guilt laced her every word and he felt like an ass.

  “Will you tell me what happened?” He tried to soften his voice. “Please?”

  She didn’t say anything for a moment. Finally, she looked up into the night sky. As angry and confused as he was, one glance at her neck in the moonlight and all he wanted to do was hold her, kiss her, make love with her.

  “I don’t know how to explain what I felt after you left,” she said softly. “One day you were here and the next day you were gone. I guess I went kind of…numb. I couldn’t believe it was over between us. I couldn’t eat. Had no appetite. I wasn’t sleeping. I felt like a robot moving through the motions of every day. Then one afternoon, about a month after you’d left, I was sitting in the gazebo, and Isaac stopped. At first, I thought he was you. I thought I was dreaming. Something about the way the shadows hit his face, darkened his hair.

  “He sat and we talked. You know how Isaac was, always so easy to talk to, and I was confused and lonely. He told me if there was anything I needed, if there was anything he could do for me, to let him know. He’d be there. He squeezed my hand and left.”

  Isaac had reached out to comfort Sophie as a friend. How could Noah fault him for that?

  “Two days later, I went to his house,” she said.

  “Why?”

  “To talk, I guess. I ached. Literally, my whole body was in pain. I didn’t know what to do, where to go. I knocked on his door and asked him to hold me. Just hold me. Who else could I go to on this island? Everyone was glad you were gone. No one else understood.

  “Isaac didn’t say a word. He missed you, too. He just stepped back and, after I walked into his house, closed the door. Led me to his couch, lay down with me and wrapped his arms around me. It felt so good. I knew he wasn’t you. He felt different, smelled different, but his arms felt like heaven around me and when I looked into his eyes, I could pretend he was you.”

  Son of a bitch. Noah looked down at the ground and bit his tongue. No man lies down with a woman without intentions.

  “We didn’t do anything at first. We fell asleep.” She took a long, deep breath as if suddenly embarrassed to go on. She looked away. “When I woke up, all I wanted to do was feel. Something good. I closed my eyes and kissed him. One thing led to another. It happened very quickly.”

  Noah picked up a rock and angrily threw it toward the water. “You were vulnerable. Isaac took advantage.”

  “It wasn’t like that. You have to remember he’d graduated from college, moved back to Mirabelle and was ready to start his life. There were very few options for him on Mirabelle. He was lonely, too, and I was the one who started it.”

  “He should’ve stopped.”

  “It happened, Noah. Once. A month later, I found out I was pregnant.”

  “Once.” He couldn’t believe it. “Once.”

  “That was all.”

  “What did he do, say?”

  “He was happy. Happy!” She shook her head. “I sobbed. He smiled.”

  “He loved kids. He couldn’t wait to be a dad.”

  “He was so excited. Right then and there, he asked me to marry him.”

  “Did you tell him you couldn’t be sure of the f
ather?”

  She nodded. “He didn’t care.”

  “Did you ever consider an abor—”

  “No.” Vehemently, she shook her head. “I kept thinking they could be your children. I wanted them to be. I wanted a piece of you. But I didn’t want them growing up without a dad.”

  He stepped away from his own pain for a moment and realized that those days, weeks, months had to have been torture for her.

  “It took me a month to make up my mind. I promised myself, and Isaac, that I would never let you come between us. I may not have been the best wife, but I tried. I stuck to that promise until the day he died.”

  “Dad said he was happy.”

  “I thought that over time, if he was angry or upset, he might punish me. He never, ever brought it up. They were his children, I was his wife, and that’s all that mattered to him.”

  “He loved you.”

  “He loved being Kurt and Lauren’s dad.”

  “Did you love him?” God help Noah, but he needed to know.

  “Isaac was steady and true. Always. I knew he would never leave.”

  “But did you love him?”

  She stood. “I loved you and where did it get me?” Then she ran into the woods.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  NOAH LAY IN BED THE NEXT morning, trying to make sense of it all. Sophie may not have answered his question last night at the lighthouse, but the fact remained that she’d loved Isaac enough to marry him. She wouldn’t have married Noah. He’d asked and she’d turned him down.

  Now what?

  When the answers didn’t miraculously pop into his mind, he threw back the covers and took a shower. As he came down the stairs his gaze caught on his camera equipment, including several digital units, different lenses and filters, a tripod, light meters and various flashes. The whole lot remained exactly where he’d thrown it upon arriving on Mirabelle.

  He picked up one of the digitals that had needed a new battery, replaced it and then framed a shot of angles and shadows playing against the photos his grandmother had hung on the wall. Then out the window he zoomed up to the Rousseau inn silhouetted against Lake Superior. Sunset would make it more interesting, but early morning would have to do. He shifted his focus to Main Street downtown. He could get a pretty good shot of the Mirabelle Inn’s gazebo out near the shoreline, but the angle was wrong. The chapel on the hill looked interesting from this vantage point, but there was no doubt it would look more inspiring from the pier.